The Animal Crossing Killer

Hi, my name is Alex, and I’m a video game collector. I have been most of my life. Ever since I was old enough to hold a controller, I loved videogames. I’ve come across some weird ones in my day, but this one takes the cake.

It was a weekend during the summer. I’m out searching for signs that say “Garage Sale, this address” along the main roads since you can always count on at least one a weekend in my neighborhood. I look for video games, promotional tapes, action figures, out of print anime, and the like. I found one, and everything was normal enough; old furniture, beat up books, exercise videos from the early 90s, old clothes, and a bunch of other junk I didn’t really care for. But in my searching, I find a couple GameCube games, Mario Party 5 and Super Monkey Ball 1 and 2 to be exact. They weren’t priced, so I ask the owner how much. He said “oh yeah, I forgot I put them out, $3 a game?” Being a skillful silent haggler, I gave my silent “I don’t know” look. I started opening the cases, checking for manuals and disks. While checking, I found a memory card in the Mario Party 5. He immediately dropped the price to $3 for the lot; all 3 games AND the memory card. “Deal.” I gave him my money, and as I was walking away, I heard him celebrating. Something about “I’m so glad that that’s out of my life.” I didn’t think anything of it. Lots of people are happy when they get rid of their junk at garage sales, and I’m happy to get it.

Once I got home, I tested out my new games. They all seemed to work fine. Then I got to the memory card. I thought, “He did drop the price quite heavily when he saw I had this. I wonder what saves are on here and if I have any of the games.” Just to be sure I wasn’t about to get some sort of virus and corrupt MY saves, I took out my memory cards before I put in this new memory card. I turned on my GameCube without a disk so I could check the systems settings and what not. I went to memory cards, and found it half full. I went to see what was on it, and there was just one town in Animal Crossing. I decided to put in my copy of Animal Crossing just to see what the town was like. That’s was my first mistake.

I start up the game, and it starts like normal; villager’s voice says “Nintendo” and we’re greeted to a human character stepping off of the train. I press start to go to the character select screen. Instead of being greeted by a neighbor like usual, I’m greeted by Officer Cooper who says, “Are you sure you want to go to Hell?” “Oh the guy who created this city is REALLY mature. What is my player’s name going to be; bastard, pussy?” I select yes, and Cooper says, “OK then, who’s going to go?” There were 4 characters, “John, Becky, Sally, and Alex.” Interesting that my name happened to be a character. What more, John wasn’t selectable. I could only play as Becky, Sally, or Alex. I decided to play as Becky. Cooper says “Suit yourself, Becky.” And the normal “I’m getting your city ready, do not turn the power off or remove memory card” comes on. Instead of Cooper saying “I hope you enjoy your time in Hell” he says, “You’ve been warned.”

So Becky walks out of her house, and it has all the possible upgrades. In fact, all the player houses are complete. I walk over to the bulletin board, and the only bulletin is “crazy killer in Hell. Leave while you still can. –John” Since it was a user created post, I figured it was just the previous owner messing with me. I’ve posted crazy things on my bulletin board in my town.

I begin walking around, just doing some exploring on the west side of the river. Every so often I would come across a sign, like the kind you’d buy at nooks place, but it had a skull and cross bones on it. Strange, but whatever; user generated stuff can be like that. I come across Nookington, but it wasn’t open. This is like 5 PM; it’s still light out in the game. Nook’s always open ‘til 11. I look closer, and I see it wasn’t closed, but boarded up. Now that’s something I haven’t seen before. I check my map to find Able’s store. I go to Able’s store, and that’s boarded up as well. I did the same for the police station and town hall, and they were boarded up as well. What was going on here?

The shop owners, police, and city weren’t the only people I couldn’t find. There weren’t any neighbors walking around. It’s not like it’s late at night and everyone’s asleep. It’s the evening. They tend to be active at about this time. Maybe they’re all in their houses for some reason.

I go over to a neighbor’s house. It said it was Dizzy’s. I walk in, and it looked like a fight happened. There was a lamp that was knocked over, the couch had stuffing coming out of it, and the dresser had what seemed to be cut marks in it. But strangest of all, was that one of those skull and cross bones signs was in the middle of the floor, erect as if it was outside. Ok, something is definitely wrong.

I walk over to where the statues are for paying off your debt, and there we all are, gold, silver, bronze and jade. I walk over to the gold statue. It said “In memory of John 2004-2010.” Now that’s not right. It’s supposed to say “This statue was erected in honor of Jon’s full loan repayment.” Why is it a memorial statue? I go over to the silver statue. This one said “In memory of Becky 2004-????” I look at the bronze, “In memory of Sally 2005-????” I get to the Jade, “In memory of Alex 2007-????” Wait, does this mean John died? No it can’t be. This is Animal Crossing. No one dies in Animal Crossing.

I had to know what was happening. The bulletin board said something about a killer, but nothing else. I can’t ask townsfolk what’s going on since this place is a ghost town. Maybe my letters will give me some insight. I pull up my inventory; every tool and 999,900 bells, not bad. I go to my letters, and there’s just one. It was a Crazy Redd flyer. Apparently he was here today in E-4. If I went to that part of the map, maybe I’d have seen his tent. I go over there, and by now the sun is setting. Redd lets me in, but he doesn’t have anything for sale. Instead of welcoming me to the store, he says “I didn’t know there were still people here. Have you heard about what happened here?” I get option of “yes it’s crazy” or “no what’s going on?” Since I really didn’t know, I answered with no. He wanted 1,000 bells for the info. I gave him the money. He told me that there was a CRAAAZZYY killer here in Hell. The killer comes out every night, killing anyone he comes across. His first victim was Officer Booker. Officer Cooper was out on patrol, and when he came back, he found Booker dead. He put out a warning, telling everyone to leave town. “Don’t even worry about moving, just leave your stuff and get out of here.” Nook and the Able sisters were smart. They boarded up their shops and left.

He said his time and knowledge was valuable, and with it getting later, so his price to continue was 10,000 bells. Well I still have money, so I gave him the money. Tortimir and the rest of the good people at city hall decided that they should stick around, since they are public servants. It wasn’t until Penny found Phylis dead at her post did she and Tortimir decide to board up city hall and get out of here. Cooper tried his hardest to find the killer, but to no avail. After 2 neighbors were killed, he issues one last warning, “if anyone is still here in Hell, get out now. I will be destroying the train tracks tonight at 6:59 PM. anyone still here after that will be trapped.”

I couldn’t believe what I was being told. Animal Crossing is E rated fun. This is getting into M territory. Redd told me “it’s getting late. I’d be CRAAAZZYY if I stayed any longer. But 100,000 bells will make me keep me here a little longer. It’d make me...CRAAZZYY.” I just had to know more, and I had enough money for it. I pay him ready to receive my info. Well, a couple of the neighbors didn’t get the memo in time and were trapped in Hell awaiting their death. According to his sources, the killer wears a goalie mask and hard hat, and uses an ax to do the deed. Furniture will slow him down, but it won’t stop him, Dizzy found that out the hard way.

I started to wonder, “If the train had its rails destroyed, how did Redd get in here since the train is the only way in or out of a city?” As if the game was reading my mind, Redd explaining that since he deals in black market furniture, he doesn’t come to Hell or any other city through conventional entry, aka “the train.” He has his own secret way in and out. He said he doesn’t have time for any more questions since night is fast approaching. He offered to get me out of here through his secret entrance, but it would cost me big time, 999,900 bells. In the dialog box, I had the option of “I don’t have that kind of money but please take what I have” and “no I can handle myself.” I chose the “I don’t have the money option” but that wouldn’t cut it; 999,900 bells, or no go. He told me he’d be here until 8 PM but if I’m not back in time with the money, he’s out of here.

I left the tent discouraged. How was I supposed to get 111,000 bells before 8? Not only are all the shops closed but it’s also 7:55 PM. I head back to Becky’s house in hopes that the previous player had some money stashed in her drawer or something, or that I’d find it buried in the ground. When I get back to my house, there’s a letter in the mail box. The letter read “Take this money and get out of there NOW!!! –From beyond the grave.” Attached to the letter was 111,000 bells, just enough for me to pay Redd to get me out of here. I’ll think about the creepiness of the letter after I get Becky out of Hell. I run over to E-4, but it was too late. Redd had already packed up and left, because the time was now 8:01 PM.

Annoyed that I just missed him, I walk back to Becky’s house. It was quite eerie, because the sky had turned black with night, and the leaves in the trees started rustling. Worried that I would run into the killer, I made Becky run, hoping that maybe, just maybe, I could figure something out. But then he found me, or I found him, I don’t know but our eyes made contact. I try to run, but I guess Becky was stunned by fear. He ran up to her, swung his ax, and loped Becky’s head off. Her body fell backward on the ground as her head rolled away, like a ball. The screen circle transitioned to black like it does whenever you save.

I’m now back at the character select screen. Like John, Becky is now unelectable. Now the character that’s on screen doing the talking is Becky. Instead of her normal pail brown skin color and dress design, her skin is paper white as was her dress. She said “avenge me Sally. Use your ax to defeat the killer.” That makes sense. The killer uses an ax, and if I have an ax, so I should be able to defeat him like that. I select Sally and begin again.

I check my inventory, full tools and 999,900 bells, just like Becky. I equipped the ax. First I checked Becky’s statue. Now it read “In memory of Becky 2004-2013.” They really were memorial statues. I run back to where Becky was killed, and in the exact spot where she died, was one of the skull and cross bones signs. It was a grave marker, showing where the character died at the hands of the killer. That explains why there was one in the middle of Dizzy’s house. He must have died there while fighting the killer. That also explains why his house is a wreck.

Right when I finished my moment of realization, I see the killer walk into view. Sally wasn’t going to go down without a fight. She had her ax ready swing. The killer comes up, and right as I get her to swing, he swings too. Our axes bounce off each other. Sally winds back up, and so does the killer. We both swing, and both bounce off. This time, I plan to let him swing but get out of the way in time for him to fall off balance giving me enough time to strike. He swings, I get Sally out of the way, get close enough to hit, and boom, it’s a hit. Unfortunately, Sally’s ax gets stuck in his hard hat, and when he gets his balance back, the ax comes out of Sally’s hands and is now stuck in his hat. Sally is now paralyzed with fear. I tried to make her get out of the way, but it was no use. The killer swings his ax and lops Sally’s head right off. Her body also fell to the ground while her head rolled away. Circle transition to black.

This time, the killer is the character at the character select screen. He says “you’re next Alex.” I wanted to stop, but I couldn’t. He was taunting me. I wasn’t going to give into a game. I had to beat him. I’ve read some creepypastas and felt like I knew where this was going. I knew they weren’t true; there’s no way that a character from a video game could come into the real world and kill me. But I wasn’t about to take any chances. I went to get my chainmail coif that I bought at an estate sale and grab my shotgun. Things were just too surreal to not be prepared for this killer showing up in my game room. As would be expected, Sally wasn’t selectable. I select Alex and got ready for something.

As Alex walked out of his house, I remembered something Redd said; “furniture will slow him down.” I have Alex walk back in his house, and I start looking at the furniture. I go down to the basement, and I get ideas for what I could do. I go back up to the first floor, move a dresser close to the door, ready to pull in front of the door. I then go down to the basement, and align the furniture such that I could have a wall of defense between me and the killer, but still maintaining a path to the stairs. I notice that the guy before me unlocked balloon fighter as one of the NES games. I begin to play it, thinking that if this is it, it’d be a fun way to go.

I begin to play it, having fun with the game within a game. Then it hits me; if I link a GBA to the GameCube, I could get Kapp’n to take me to the island, or he’d just take me out to sea. Either way, I’d get out of Hell. I grab the GBA that I always have connected to my GameCube, and turn it on.

Right as I turn it on, the game cuts away from my game in Balloon Fighter to a shot of the first floor. There’s the sound of wood being chopped. Ka-thunk, Ka-thunk, Ka-breesh, and in stumbles the killer. He yells “AAAAALEXXXX, Come out and plaaaaay.” He then walks down to the basement. He sees that I’m over in the corner and runs over to my wall. He begins to hack at the dresser that was between him and virtual Alex. As he’s chopping away, I run down the little hall that I made. I get to the stairs, and move a bed between the “hall” and the stairs. I run up the stairs, move the dresser in front of the door, and make a break for the dock. I’m about half way to the dock, when the game cuts back to my house. The killer stumbles out and yells “AAALLLLEEEEXXXX!!!!!!” I keep running. I get to the acre with the dock. I can hear the waves crashing on the shore, and I can see the top of the sand. Right as Kapp’n and his dingy come into view, the killer also comes into frame. I guess he can run faster than players and other NPCs. Just as Alex steps on the dock, he gets Alex from behind. His body falls forward to the ground as his head rolls into the sea. Kapp’n is rowing away as fast as he can while the screen circle transitions to black.

The screen is black for a second or 2. After the silence, I can faintly hear the Resetti theme, ba-da bum bump ba, ba-da bum bump ba, ba-da bum bump ba, bump-bump ba bummmp dump ba. A it slowly gets louder, the spot light becomes brighter, slowly revealing the killer. Once it reaches maximum brightness and volume, I see the killer, with the heads of Becky, Sally, Alex, and whom I presume to be John, at his feet. He is holding his ax. A voice bubble pops up.

“..........”

“This is what happens....

(flips up mask)

WHEN YOU DON’T SAVE!!!!!”

It was Resetti with his really angry face; his eyes are wide open, his eyebrows point down in the angry fashion, and his mouth is in the yelling position.

With that, I turned off the game, yanked out the memory card, threw the memory card across the room at the door, and just sat in the corner, all night, watching the door, all the time hugging my shotgun. I didn’t sleep that night. How could I? I just sat there, rocking back and forth, thinking about the events that just happened.